English to 12-Year-Old AOLer Translator

[six_storm]

Just in case you ever needed one . . .

http://ssshotaru.homestead.com/files/aolertranslator.html

NOW U CAN TRANSLAET WUT CRANEGER SI SAYNG!!1!1!1!!!11!!1!!1!!1 OMG WTF

[Revs]

HALO, MAH NM3 SI R3VS

[Qbert]

U R AL GAY SEX BUT BANGERS!1!1! LOL GET A LIEF/WIEF!1!!1111 OMG

[six_storm]

U R AL GAY SEX BUT BANGERS!1!1! LOL GET A LIEF/WIEF!1!!1111 OMG

QBRT S2P SHAKNG UR BUT ON MAH COMPUTER SCREN!!1!!!!!!!11!1!!! LOL

[Qbert]

I HOPA U LIEK MAH BUT STREAKS ON UR COMPUT3R SCREN TH3N BIG BOY!1111! LOL GO GET DA SECHBOTS NOW!11!111!1 OMG WTF LOL NOW!!11!1 WTF LOL

[zoomy942]

best evar!

[Qbert]

BST 3VAR!11!11! LOL

FIEX

[six_storm]

I HOPA U LIEK MAH BUT STREAKS ON UR COMPUT3R SCREN TH3N BIG BOY!1111! LOL GO GET DA SECHBOTS NOW!11!111!1 OMG WTF LOL NOW!!11!1 WTF LOL

DONT TAST ME QBRT!!11!11 WTF IL GO T3L ZOMS MOM TAHT U PUT UR FNGER UP MAH BUT AND MAED M3 FEL BAD!!1!11!!11!!11111!!!1 WTF LOL

[six_storm]

FIEX

:rofl
:rofl
:rofl

[zoomy942]

i translated an email that isent to my users this morning.

UESRS

THARA HAS BAN A SUDAN INCRAAES IN DA NUMBR OF R INFACTIONS TAHT WEB PC’S AND MOBIEL COMPUTERS HAEV COME IN CONTACT WITH!11!1 WTF LOL THES SI MANELEY DU3 2 R DESIGNERS CREATNG POPUPS TAHT RES3MBL3 THIS!1!1! OMG

WHIEL THES SEMS LIEK A WINDOW TAHT SEMS 2 B HALPNG U IT SI NOT!!!1111! OMG LOL IT SI A RUES TAHT R CREA2RS UES 2 HAEV U CLIK IT AND ONLEY AT TAHT POINT DO U BCOME INF3CTED!111!1!11 OMG WTF TEH R R WE UES AT WEB SI D3SIGNED BY MICROSOFT (WINDOWS DEF3ND3R) AND WIL NEV3R SHOW A POPUP WINDOW SUCH AS THIS!11!1111 OMG IT RUNS IN TEH BAKGROUND TRANSPAERNT 2 DA UESR AND WIL NOT REQUIER INTERVENTION

IN!11!1 OMG TEH FUTURA – PLZ R3MIND U AND ANYONE WHO MAY UES UR PC 2 ALWAYS CLIK DA RED X ON DA UPER RIGHT OF TH3SA WINDOWS!!!!1! LOL

IF U HAEV ANY QU3STIONS PLZ LET ME KNOW

PAUL
!11!11

[zoomy942]

another one


THES 3MALE SERVES AS A RAMINDER TAHT DURNG TEH WINTER MONTHS I WORK AWAY FROM W3B ON THURSDAY MORNNGS AND AL DAY FRIDAYS!11!1 LOL DURNG THOSA TIEMS MAH AVALEABILITY 2 VOIEC CALS SI LIMIETD BUT AMALENG AND TEXTNG WIL B RESPONDAD 2 MUCH QUIK3R!111111 WTF SO DURNG THES TIEM PLZ UES TAXTNG AND 3MALE 2 COMUNICAET WIT M3 WHIEL IM AWAY FROM W3B!!1!1!!1 WTF LOL I WIL RESPOND V3RY QUIKLEY V3RSUS PHON3 CALS!!!1! OMG WTF LOL I WIL CH3K VOIECMALES BUT IT WIL NOT B UNTIL MUCH L8R

ALSO!1!!11!! IM STIL 10% AVALEABLA FOR EMERG3NCEIS SO PLZ DO NOT H3SITAET IF ONE ARIESS!!1!1 WTF LOL

PAUL

[six_storm]

Here's one I sent to a client:

GOD MORNNG!11!!! OMG WTF LOL HAEV U ALR3ADY CONECTAD TEH PROVIEDD HARD DRIEV 2 TEH NAS YET???!!?!! WTF I WANT3D 2 GAT THES3 BAKUPS GONG AS SON AS POSIBL3 SINCA TH3Y MAY TAEK A WHIEL 2 PERFORM!1!1111!! LOL CAN U L3T M3 KNOW WHEN U HAEV DA D3VIEC CONACT3D???!?!!? OMG WTF LOL THX!!1111!11 OMG WTF LOL

[Tr1cK]

Last paragraph from the inauguration:

MARICA IN DA FAEC OF OUR COMON DANG3RS IN THES WINTER OF OUR HARDSHIP LET US R3M3MBR TH3SE TIEMLES WORDS!11!!!!! WTF WIT HOPA AND VIRTU3 L3T US BRAEV ONC3 MOR3 DA ICY CUR3NTS AND 3NDURA WUT S2RMS MAY COM3!!!111!1! LOL L3T IT B SADE BY OUR CHILDRANS CHILDR3N TAHT WH3N WE WARE TASTED WE R3FUESD 2 LET THES JOURNAY END TAHT W3 DID NOT TURN BAK NOR DID WE FALT3R AND WIT EYAS FIEXD ON DA HORIZON AND GODS GRAEC UPON US WE CAREID FORTH TAHT GR3AT GIFT OF FREDOM AND DALIEVR3D IT SAEFLEY 2 FUTURE G3NARATIONS!1!1!!!! WTF

[six_storm]

Last paragraph from the inauguration:

MARICA IN DA FAEC OF OUR COMON DANG3RS IN THES WINTER OF OUR HARDSHIP LET US R3M3MBR TH3SE TIEMLES WORDS!11!!!!! WTF WIT HOPA AND VIRTU3 L3T US BRAEV ONC3 MOR3 DA ICY CUR3NTS AND 3NDURA WUT S2RMS MAY COM3!!!111!1! LOL L3T IT B SADE BY OUR CHILDRANS CHILDR3N TAHT WH3N WE WARE TASTED WE R3FUESD 2 LET THES JOURNAY END TAHT W3 DID NOT TURN BAK NOR DID WE FALT3R AND WIT EYAS FIEXD ON DA HORIZON AND GODS GRAEC UPON US WE CAREID FORTH TAHT GR3AT GIFT OF FREDOM AND DALIEVR3D IT SAEFLEY 2 FUTURE G3NARATIONS!1!1!!!! WTF

:rofl

The last 7-9 words is the best!

[Qbert]

Song lyrics...

I LIEK BIG BUTS AND I CAN NOT U OTHER BROTHERS CANT DENY
TAHT WHEN A GIRL WOKS IN WIT AN ITY BITY WASET
AND A ROUND THNG IN UR U G3T SPRUNG WANA PUL OUT UR 2UGH
CAUES U NOTIEC TAHT BUT WAS STUFED
DEP IN TEH J3ANS SHAS WEARNG
IMM HOK3D AND I CANT S2P STARNG

*BAI*

3DIT FIEXD.!!!11!!1!!1!1!11!!!1!1

*BA
E*

[zoomy942]

anyone getting married?

(NMA) I TAEK U 2 B MAH LAWFULY W3DED (HUSBAND/WIEF)
BFORE!!1!111 OMG LOL THASA WITN3SES I VOW 2 LUV U AND R FOR U LONG AS W3 BOTH SHAL LIEV
I!!!!!1! OMG WTF TAEK U WIT AL UR FAULTS AND STRANGTHS
AS I OFAR MYSALF 2 U AL MAH FAULTS AND STRENGTHS
I!!11! OMG WTF LOL WIL HELP U WH3N U NED HELP AND
TURN 2 U WHEN I NED HELP
I!!!1!!1 LOL CHOS3 U AS TEH PARSON WIT WHOM I WIL SP3ND MAH LIEF!!!1!! WTF

[zoomy942]

definition of internetz

TEH INT3RN3T SI A GLOBAL SYSTEM OF INT3RCONACTED COMPUTER NATWORKS TAHT INTERCHANGE DATA BY PAKET SWITCHNG USNG TEH STANDARDIEZD INTERN3T PRO2COL SUIET (TCP/IP)!!!1!111! WTF LOL IT SI A NATWORK OF NETWORKS TAHT CONSISTS OF MILIONS OF PRIVAET AND PUBLIC ACAEDMIC BUSIENS AND GOV3RNMANT NATWORKS OF LOCAL 2 GLOBAL SCOPE TAHT R LINKED BY COPER WIERS FIEBR-OPTIC CABL3S WIERLES CONACTIONS AND OTHER T3CHNOLOGEIS

!!11!11 WTF

[six_storm]

Urban Dictionary definition of Gangbang:

WHEN MULTIPL3 PARTN3RS USUALY 3 OR MOR3 ANGAEG IN S3XUAL INT3RCOURSE WIT A SNGL3 WILNG PARTN3R!1!111!11 OMG WTF LOL (IF PARTN3R SI UNWILNG IT SI CALAD GANG RAEP)
!!11!1!!

[TheOneAndOnly]

3NGLISH MOTHARFUK3R!!11!1!11 DO U SP3AK IT???!?!!??!!?!!!?!????!!!!!!! WTF LOL

[TheOneAndOnly]

LOL I MIGHT ACTUALY LIEK THIS!!!1! OMG WTF ITL RILLY ZIMG DA SPELNG NAZIS.
!1!1!!!!!1111!111 LOL

[Revs]

LOL I MIGHT ACTUALY LIEK THIS!!!1! OMG WTF ITL RILLY ZIMG DA SPELNG NAZIS.
!1!1!!!!!1111!111 LOL

QUIT STARNG AT MAH AS!!1!111 WTF LOL

[six_storm]

QUIT STARNG AT MAH AS!!1!111 WTF LOL

I DONT LIEK 2WELS 3SPECIALY REVS 2WELS!11!111 WTF LOL ITS AL STIKY AND GREASY
!!!111! OMG WTF LOL

[Revs]

PR3SIEDNT BARAK OBMA HAS CALED FOR DA US 2 BCOME AN3RGY IND3PANDANT SAYNG ITS R3LIANCE ON FOR3IGN OIL AND GLOBAL WARMNG POSAD THREATS
OUTLINNG!!!!!!1 OMG WTF LOL HIS 3NERGY PRIORITEIS HE SADE TEH COUNTRY WUD NOT B H3LD HOSTAEG 2 DWINDLNG RESOURCES HOSTIEL R3GIEMS AND A WARMNG PLAENT
HE!1!!!!! WTF CAL3D FOR GRE8R FUAL EFICEINCY AND AN AN3RGY ACONOMY AMEED AT CRAATNG MILIONS OF JOBS
HE!!1!!1 ALSO ORD3RED A R3VEIW OF WHETH3R STAETS CAN S3T CAR EMISION STANDARDS!1!1!!! OMG LOL

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/7851038.stm

[TheOneAndOnly]

QUIT STARNG AT MAH AS!!1!111 WTF LOL

YEAH!!1!!!!!! WUT U SADE!
!!1!1!!!1!!!! LOL

THX FOR A NU SIG!
!!1!!!!1!!!1!!!!! OMG

[Qbert]

YEAH!!1!!!!!! WUT U SADE!
!!1!1!!!1!!!! LOL

THX FOR A NU SIG!
!!1!!!!1!!!1!!!!! OMG

U SHUD MAEK UR UPDAETD SIG LINK 2 A AS3S AS!111!!

FO SHIZLA MAH DIZLE!!11!1 WTF LOL